Look in the mirror. Does the person you see match the person you feel like on the inside? How much stock do you put in appearances?
When I look in the mirror, I hate it. Which probably speaks volumes of how I feel like on the inside. I tend to hate myself a lot. When they say your harshest critic and worst enemy is yourself? They weren’t kidding. I sometimes wish I could transform myself to something else. Maybe a butterfly, but I remember once reading a manga with a woman who had turned into a butterfly in order to be saved from something and that ended horribly. She ate her lover and was cradling his dead body with guts exposed saying how she wanted to be with him forever.
… Okay, maybe I don’t want to be a butterfly after all…
Appearances are important though. Kids? They adore me. They can see a gentle, kind person because of my smile and want me to smile at them always. Adults? I’m sure they see some idiot looking at them, and long for sophistication and the type of sexiness I can’t exude no matter how hard I try. I’m “cute” but that’s about it. Which, let’s face it, to a lot of people says ugly. Though I guess I can’t be that bad; children are quite frank and I remember a young boy had been sitting at circle and tried explaining the difference between girls and boys:
“Girls are prettier,” he said, blushing bashfully as he lifted his eyes shyly upon me. “Teacher, you’re pretty too.”
Kids, man. They may be crazy, but they say the sweetest things that just melt your heart and go d’aww.